Fear of death and an unsatisfactory life

I do not know if I am the only one who fears the inevitability of death and an unsatisfactory life, but for those who think they are alone, I'm here to help.

Sometimes I am really deep in thought, and I think of how it would be to just not exist. To not be able to feel, breathe, smell, touch, etc. and not be conscious. It's a thought that comes and goes because it's so deep that it's really hard to feel it for than a few seconds. It scares me. It scares me that one day, inevitably, I won't exist.

For me, the best way of combating this was looking at it this way:

I aspire to live a life so fulfilling, so satisfying, that when I am old, I will be able to sit down, and accept death; be ready to die.

Just imagine not feeling any regrets, nothing; just satisfaction.

I have made this my life goal.

I am only 14 years old and I have so much more to go, but starting younger is better. Now the question is: how will I accomplish this?

  1. GO OUTDOORS. This one may be a bit biased but for me it helps out a lot. I look at it this way; if I were to get a pin, and stick it onto a map, the needle thin point of that pin (something super small) represents an area relative to about the same size of my town... it really shows to me how insignificant I really am relative to the world. Looking at the stars is the same. How could something so big, look so small? It's because it is so far away... it shows me really how small I am in the grand scheme of things. Anyway, how does going outdoors tackle this?

By going outdoors you are in tune with yourself, and your body. Most people nowadays are consumed by pixelated screens; I call that "mindless media", media made for you to get distracted and out of touch from reality. Getting outdoors allows you to feel yourself breathe fresh air, and feel the weight of each step...

  1. EXPLORATION - going outdoors encourages you to explore; and by exploring new places, it helps me feel more empowered and more significant on ththe face of this earth, because it makes me feel satisfied to know that I've been there, done that, and saw just a little more of what the world has to offer.

A lot of people nowadays don't enjoy the outdoors for the reason I'm about to tell you: typically, people nowadays walk the same routes/ways to places, over and over. Ex. When you walk to school; it's repetitive to the point it's boring. When you go down the same path/route every day you get out of touch of reality because the familiarity bores you so you fill your mind with thoughts in an attempt to fill the boredom. This is why when you walk to school you may find yourself very caught up in thoughts like "what am I gonna do when I get home? What do I wanna cook tonight?", etc.

However, I challenge you. EXPLORE. Go somewhere new, or find a new route, or walk during sunrise or sunset instead of at noon or evening. The unfamiarity will keep you more in touch with the moment. Walk, and look at the trees, or the sky. Listen to the birds. Be in touch with reality. Appreciate consciousness and life for what it really is. You can make something as little as a walk feel satisfying to your significance and consciousness.

So many people think they need money to explore, like to travel internationally. I live with a single mother in a financially unstable household... but my mom once got me a bike. A shitty bike, but one that I valued so much because it opened up so much opportunities in terms of exploration. To this day it is the best gift I have ever recieved (besides life).

  1. TAKE OUT ANY PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE WHO DON'T ADD VALUE TO YOUR LIFE - I have had depression for about 2 years now. I know from experience how much stress can come from maintaining social relationships with people who add no value to your life. Don't make it a big deal; just gradually ease into not hanging out with them and not talking to them. If they are clingy, you may want to talk to them. However, try the first method first.

What I mean by people who don't add value to your life is people who you feel like you have to force or drag out conversations or interactions with just to feel polite. As many would say, "fakes" or "fake friends". Or people who you feel wouldn't like you for who you truly are, so you put on a mask and act like someone you aren't. Surround yourself with people who understand you, and people who accept you without you having to alter your personality. It takes off so much stress and makes the quality of life so much better. I have only ever met 1 person who does this for me. For you, maybe it hasn't happened yet. But trust me. There is someone out there.

So listen; if you are scared of death or scared of living an unfulfilled life, try your very best to live life so that when you are old, you will have no regrets and will be ready to die happy.

I am only 14 and I feel so lucky to have realized this so early on; when I'm young I have so much time to spare. No bills to pay, no taxes.

God bless everyone reading this.

POSTING DATE: May 2, 2019
Post created Mar 13, 2019

Public discussion (1)

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7 months ago

Wow! You’re one smart 14 year old! This was awesome to read. Thank you for sharing. I also am a strong believe in the idea that all these electronic devices are made to distract us! Getting outside is so important.

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